Music in the Air

Here I thought my life playing music was LONG gone - and if I did play it certainly wouldn't be fun - WOW was I ever wrong...

I'm now playing keyboard for two church bands - one is only temporary until the ministry gets off the ground and gets their own members involved and ready to take on the fun - I am still amazed that I'm not in charge of my own life and that even after all this time I can actually be useful and enjoy myself at the same time!

I am working through what I have referred to as "survival". I've been a "good Christian" for a long time and I've known that forgiveness is for you and not the other person - but I never applied that knowledge to the person(s) who broke into my home back in Alabama the winter before we moved to Florida...stealing my computer, heirlooms, game systems - I could handle - we would replace it, but stealing my keyboard - the very back-burner item in the purchasing hierarchy - I couldn't let it go. Then it dawned on me that it had not been replaced for that very reason...I had to let it go and forgive whomever took it without consideration of how it would impact my life. I stayed a prisoner for 5 1/2 years - and my feelings have not yet caught up to my mind and my will, but I have made a choice that the responsible party is forgiven. Truth be told, I wanted weighted keys anyway! This will seem a silly post to most people, but maybe I'll print this and maybe one of my kids will need to see this someday.
That's the point, right? Having yourself in a position to make sure you do a little better than your parents, and your kids do a little (or a lot) better than you do? I like to think so.

Root Canal

The children left today for a two day trip w/ "papa and Nonna". One would think that this would be a great thing; sending a shout out on FB that we were kid free, things were looking up!
Then I went to the dentist.
The x-ray was painless, as always. The piece of paper showing the "worst case" bill was NOT! Forget even the THOUGHT of a keyboard for myself (a stretch at most, again, those kids keep needing things like clothes and shoes)

Many injections later we begin a 2 1/2 hour procedure, which involved me having to be reclined at about a 40 degree angle...upside down. My dentist is very nice and has a fantastic assistant; but recovering is the same with all - painful and slow - it runs in the family. My brother and I always require crazy levels of pain meds and a steriod to calm the surrounding nerves down. Not the greatest family trait.

I am now typing this for my lone reader to glance at, hoping for a little sympathy. I miss my family at times like these; I was the youngest by several years, so I'm pretty pampered. Significant pain reverts me to what my friends describe as the equivalent to having a sick husband.

Roles are reversed in our household. My husband is a saint and very easy to care for should he actually ever get sick, as are my children. I'm the wimp :-) At least I'm willing to say so...

Kid pics and Misc. thoughts

Well, the in-laws arrived on Friday evening and left today to go stay in a hotel w/ travel points just for fun... No complaints here! 3 kids lighter will make life easier for 48 hours....such a short time to enjoy - and I have to visit the dentist *sigh* Not looking forward to that.
I suppose the truth of the matter is that the "quiet" will allow enough time to restore order to the piles of laundry and masses of welcomed but must be used fresh veggies from the gardens in Alabama - where there's real dirt :-)
Hopefully the dentist will be kind and not leave me miserable so I can "fry up some squash" for my husband to have for dinner.

I have braved the stores and the prices to complete shopping for school next week and I'm tired! Forget all the little extras...let them send home a note to tattle on Mrs. Helms for not sending in the hand sanitizer! Tsk Tsk! They will have to wait until I go to Sam's and I'll buy ONE giant container for each elementary student.

Life's Road...

It's been MONTHS since my last post and I wanted my "blog" to be like Julie and Kelly - all family oriented with pictures as a scrap-book substitute...
I finally came to the realization that it's just not me.
My blog might not be very popular, nor even interesting to most BUT at least I will know that I "say what I need to say" :-)

My life exists in a better plane when I'm involved in music...particularly Christian Praise/Worship. I was in a group in a great church and I was really sad and somewhat shocked when I felt it was time to step back. I knew between my physical illness and my experience that it wasn't good for my family because I didn't have energy for them but managed to get myself to practice - fair? I think not! Then my husband told me I was on a break...heartbreak would have been more appropriate.
How could I walk through those doors and watch my friends and team-mates enjoy my greatest love outside my home?

I sum it up to the fact that there are seasons for everything, and although I enjoy it, it may not be available to me all the time. My husband's only request is that I get better. A tall order when migraines attack frequently.

So, on a family weekend, we found a new church to visit just to have a break. I wouldn't feel any obligation - it turned out they have a program for all sorts of "ailments". We met the pastor and he said "Recovery is good for anybody; you don't have to be a meth-head to go" - needless to say, that cracked me up - but it stuck with me.
I realized I had become a shrew. I hated feeling bad, my family hated me feeling bad and it was time to do something about it. So off I went... Wouldn't you know it's on Friday evenings and even better - they have a band.
I auditioned to be a back-up singer my second week. Then they actually asked me to play keyboard - umm I haven't played in 10 years.... my attempts with the younger kids at church were rough, so I didn't think I could - but the band members were patient and somehow it worked out - I was so excited, but still had a choice about Sundays...

Now I have to find a way to express my gratitude to the members of my old church and hope that they take me at my word; grateful.
Right now, I need to just be a congregation member for services. Once I can manage my home, I'll see about more. My dear husband is big on not burning bridges, and he's right - I hope they'll understand. All I can do is tell them all I love them very much, I am grateful to have had time with them and that I have to defeat these headaches. If I give up now, I'm no better than those I criticize for not doing anything about his/her circumstances.

As I said; my blog might not be catchy and fun; but it's a leap for me - I'm not the mother my mom was. She would have had the scrap book :-)

Stay-At-Home Mom Paradox

As my children advance through the ranks of growing older, I find that the term "stay-at-home-mom" is as silly as "working mom"!

This past week my "heart baby" son has had a CT scan to rule out infection in the brain, an "echo" on his heart to rule out clotting around his heart repair from surgery last year, and suffered his first diagnosed migraine. At the same time my daughter's asthma was out of control due to pollen near the PE area, and trying to resolve Social Security issues for my elderly father. Few of these things involved staying home. Thank God for my healthy middle-school-ee.

My mom was actually a SAHM. She had no call waiting, no microwave until I was 12, no cell phone until I had children, and there was NEVER a question of "what are we eating after church?" because it had been put in the crock pot at 5 am! Those were the days.

I sit back and MARVEL at those who have their homes tidy, laundry caught up, and children to various activities with calm faces.



I do not pretend to be one of these brave souls, as I believe anytime you can sit instead of stand is fantastic, any activity that involves sitting and waiting for them to finish while you read a magazine should be a national law, and school buses are the work of a genius!


This has been a briefing from a present-day, not so stay-at-home mom.

My boys are in Print!

As the proud parent of my Scouts, I am pleased to say that my boys were recognized for their religious emblem awards at the last Pack meeting and I took the opportunity to start the PR campaign for Pack 220! The local paper is happy to print the news, and even in color!

My older son, Joshua has since decided Scouting isn't what he wants right now. I'm in that parental state of trying to allow them to make decisions, even if they aren't ideal, to show I trust him. I am depending on my heavenly Father to help him find the words I should and should not say to him right now, as well as to help my precious son find out who he is.

My middle son, is a happy Scout, I'm glad to say, because we've really put in a lot of work! I even went to "Scout College"! One thing that the boys will remember is that their Mom and Granddad, aka Poppy, taught the religious class to them. I'm proud to have that in the family line. My dad glowed every week the young boys came to class and he had the chance to interject his wisdom with the boys.
Here they are! Caleb is up first, happy as usual. Joshua is far right on the group photo.

Harmony in the Chaos

In the balancing act that is life, I need solid ground. I want a foundation for my family that certain things just are and do not change. There's enough to venture into in the world. Every day brings a little adventre if you have children!
I have to say, as boring as it might seem to some, it is amazing the strength I gain from singing at church. It is work, it is exhausting because I give it everything inside me, but it by far one of the most rewarding things I do.
Music is a universal language. Every country follows ONE language to read it, has agreed that sharps, flats, and timing signatures all mean the same thing no matter where you are.
I need that in the midst of unpacking, scouting, parenting, being married, the affairs of my father, the ache of my mother being here no more - something I can see and hear needs to stay the same. Music does. As much as genres come and go the way it's created and written and sung truly does not differ much. There's still a melody line, and "A" is always an "A" and C7 means the same thing whether it's Country or Contemporary Christian.
Yes, yes, to those super Christians out there, God is always with me. As a good friend put it several years ago, sometimes you need Jesus with skin on. I'm never more grateful for my heavenly Father than in music or song. It's one of the most powerful mediums on earth for lots of directions, really. I believe I love it so much because it has a similarity to God that there are certain things about music that never change, but you're finding out new tunes and harmonies all the time.
I find freedom in those boundaries, that as long as I pay attention, this Melody can find Harmony in the craziness I call life!